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30 October 2006

"Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength." ~ C.H. Spurgeon

My galley is charged with challenges. I think I will always be here in this place, this place of wanting more. Always more. More books, more understandings, more writings, more artworks, more songs, more thoughts, more ideas, more kids, more people, more places, more loves. I want more of life, and yet never enough do I want more of God. With more of God, I have more of life. Perhaps there in lies the reason for my lacking. I want to finish school so that I might really begin to learn. I want to finish work so that I might really begin to labor. I want to finish my fun so that I might really begin to enjoy. I want so much and fail so greatly. If I could just grasp the hint of Christ in my daily life, I would have so much more than I know. Why am I failing to see Him? Is it the aggravation of busy work or the denial of His calling for me? I cannot seem to get comfortable and the unrest is hard on the spirit. I want to do it all and I want to do it all now. No, that is not right. I want to do it all and I want to do it yesterday. God help me not give up! I must continue to strive for His glory and find the place He wants me to be. Where is contentment, where is faith? Has faith fled the city or have I fled from faith? Must it always be this anxiety, this impatience, this sin? Where is grace, where is peace? I have so much and am blind. I do want more. That must be okay; that must be alright. But I must learn a love for the wait.

01 October 2006

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde



The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is an excellent look into the duality of mankind. It is a great read. I have trouble getting into books, no matter how much I wish against that fact. I'm slowly, very slowly changing. Most people know the story of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, so the anticipation of the unfolding of events is strong. Robert Louis Stevenson, author of Treasure Island, The Master of Ballantrae, Kidnapped, and more, starts the book off by setting a stage of characters. His narrative of the characters is always substantive and clear. It's as if anyone of the characters might be able to meet up for coffee sometime, including the infamous Mr. Hyde. The people are real. When I came closer to the end, I had trouble getting into the story, simply because I felt I had it all figured out. I knew who was who. I solved the supposed mystery. The unfolding of events did not have much farther to go. So I put the book aside. That was a mistake. I hate an unfinished book, so I picked the book back up out of principle. The last chapter is gripping and reaches right at the heart of humanity. I found the tale desperately sad, but perfectly honest. Stevenson was wearing one strong pair of worldview glasses when writing this tale. "My instinct and all the circumstances of my nameless situation tell me that the end is sure and must be early. Go then, and first read the narrative which Lanyon warned me he was to place in your hands; and if you care to hear more, turn to the confession of
"Your unworthy and unhappy friend,
"Henry Jekyll."